contusion: a love story by Daya Daniels

Author:Daya Daniels [Daniels, Daya]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Sayad Books
Published: 2019-10-25T05:00:00+00:00

Taqtu

HE LOOKS LIKE A schoolboy—studious and focused…only on me.

I need his eyes on me.

Adoring.

Loving.

Making me come alive again!

Rihanna’s “Kiss It Better” echoes from the radio.

Easing back into the seat, I let out a loud breath, uncertain if I want to drift off once more for the sake of telling this man my terrible life story. Dragging a hand through my hair, I wait just a moment for my skin to lose its heat from the almost contact we just had. I don’t speak for a while, feeling oddly distracted and focused only on the view beyond the window of the snow-covered parking lot.

Fiona Apple’s “Sullen Girl” echoes from the radio.

Slowly, I begin to fasten the two buttons of my uniform that Lee mustn’t have noticed I undid.

“Don’t.” His low voice cuts into my actions.

Hands stilling, my vision slowly drifts over to his.

“Don’t do them up.” Throat working hard as if there’s something massive lodged in there, he manages to offer me a gentle smile—a gift. “It looks good like that.”

I inhale sharply and then lower my hands to let them rest in my lap.

“You don’t want to talk about this, Taq, do you?”

“No.”

Lee nods. “Yes, I can tell because you are doing everything to avoid doing so.”

“You will judge me.”

After pushing his plate aside, he leans in, eyes hard. “Never.”

I sit up straighter and then slowly I caress my chin and my fingers skitter over my scar. “No one ever notices this.” Pressing into my skin, I adore the raised area, feeling pride that I had survived this marking and then I remember the pain. “Do we ever dare show the world our bruises without the fear of being judged?” A chuckle drifts from me, yet nothing but embarrassment torches my heart.

Lee’s brows knot. “Are there more, Taq?”

“Yes, of course there are.” My nod is tiny. “My body is a warzone.”

Rolling up his sleeves, he sits forward. “I want to see them all, Taq.”

“They aren’t beautiful.”

“They don’t have to be. They’re scars. But believe it or not scars can be beautiful.”

Scars can be beautiful?

“Yes, Taq.” I nod just once. “They are evidence worn on your skin or on your heart that you survived something and because you did, you’re not who you used to be but changed forever, though still whole.”

Still whole?

Not fractured or broken…

But still whole.

“I see.” My lips break out into a smile and once again we drift into a comfortable silence.

The wind outside rushes by. The twinkling stars dot the black sky. The streetlamps flicker and turn the snow-covered ground golden. It’s picturesque beyond this window. A harsh landscape. But still so, so remarkable. Past the glass to my left is beauty which survives among harshness. Like me.

“Taq.” Lee’s voice urges me from my daydreaming.

“Yesssss.” I don’t look at him when I reply.

“We’ve avoided this for long enough…please tell me now because I want to know.”

Slowly, my chin lowers and I face him head-on, wondering if I have the courage to speak of my dirtiest, filthiest, black, black secret aloud.

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